Things were looking good after just five minutes when Simon Lappin managed to get a decent ball into the box and Mixu Paatelainen thumped home a header. Things seemed to have got even better ten minutes later when Mixu tapped home a Kirk Broadfoot knock down, however Kirk was already a good few yards out of play, along with the ball, before he knocked it back. Sadly, that was as good as things would get.
Ex Saint David Lowing was finding loads of space down the right, and with twenty minutes or so gone whipped a great cross into the box which Paul Tosh easily headed home. Another goal conceded thanks to a cross and a header.
Lowing was lucky to stay on the pitch ten minutes later. After the ball went out for a throw in, he appeared to elbow Saints David van Zanten, something which went unnoticed by the referee and his assistant. van Zanten stupidly complained, and was told to calm down. He complained again, and Andy Millen had to calm him down before he was booked. Incredibly, van Zanten still moaned and was almost sent off. What the hell were you playing at David? He isn't likely to change his mind after booking you?
Just before half time another Lowing cross was headed past Craig Hinchliffe for 2-1 Forfar. Even worse, this time it was a Millen own goal! Forfar were finding far too much room inside the Saints box thanks to terrible defending from Millen, Broadfoot and Kevin McGowne, who reassured us all with the fact that Captain Chaos is safe and well.
Half time then, and 2-1 to Forfar. Surely things would improve in the second half. Aye, very good.
The defence continued with it's "after you" policy. Barry Sellars smacked home Forfar's third after a knock down. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! WHat are we doing in training? Why can't we stop other folk heading? With guys like McGowne and Broadfoot, plus Mark Dempsie when fit, why the hell can we not stop folk from heading the ball more often than not?
Broadfoot was lucky to stay on the pitch a few minutes later, after an incident with a Forfar player saw them squaring up to each other.
Incredibly, we conceded yet another goal to pish defending, a corner not cleared properly, another cross hammered in and another header was popped past Hinchy.
It couldn't get any worse surely? It could, when McGowne just decided to do bugger all as the ball came towards him, and let Tosh smack a good shot past Hinchcliffe. Feckity.
Sub John O'Neill managed to get one back for Saints with a decent shot past Michael Brown in the Forfar goal, and at this point I was worried that in the unlikely event of us managing three we'd see another half hour. Fortunately it never happened.
It was a disgraceful performance and Forfar fully deserved their win. The defence was absolutely terrible, and Ricky Gillies was non existent. If they wouldn't run off crying to their agents and unions, everyone should be fined. There was simply no effort.
It will take a lot of work to ensure this doesn't happen again, especially as MacPherson seems intent on using the back three with fools like Millen and McGowne in it. No doubt ex Saint David Lowing was having a wee chuckle during the second half at how bad we were.
Thank god it wasn't in the league, Ross County could well run riot on Saturday.
There are two consolations. The first is we avoided suspensions and injuries. The second is that in 1986 Forfar thrashed us 5-1 in the league cup. That same season we won the Scottish Cup...