These are usually a good laugh if you don't happen to support Hearts, and as I don't I find them hillarious. Whilst some comments about the Old Firm may not actually be that far from the truth, others are down right mental. Talk of priests shooting people during wars and players working for the Old Firm whilst signed for Hearts are excellent. If you can, get a copy of Thursday's Daily Record - it's worth it!
Because of these rants, the media focus will probably be on Hearts and Romanov - who will be attending his first game since October. Let's hope the Saints team can turn up for their first game in 2007 because we've hardly competed this year. Our last shot (let alone goal or point) which forced the keeper into a save (not including Richard Brittain's penalty) probably came in the cup game against Dundee United at Tannadice. We are that poor at the moment. Hopefully, the controversy at Tynecastle will help us to do a bit better today.
If Saints boss Gus MacPherson wants to win today - and I think he might - there is one thing he must do: start Stewart Kean. When he brought him in for the game against Hearts at Love Street, he scored twice before going off injured after just half an hour. Had he stayed on, he would easily have scored a hat trick. He also scored in the 1-0 at Tynecastle. Quite simply, he must start - and it would be nice to see him and John Sutton actually getting some service from midfield.
The other hero of the Gorgie win in September was Tony Bullock, but it's extremely unlikely he'll play today. He has disappeared completely from the squad over the past few weeks, although the media don't seem to be as interested in such things when you don't have a crazy Lithuanian in charge of your team (both on and off the pitch). Chris Smith is likely to get the nod once more, although some Saints fans would like to see the return of Craig Hinchcliffe. New signings Paul Lawson and Eddie Malone are both fit and raring to go after playing in a reserve game, which saw Billy Mehmet and - even more incredibly - Iain Anderson and Brian McGinty playing. It will be nice not to include them on next week's injury round up for a change! The only injury victims are now Hugh Murray and Craig Molloy (unless I missed something), so the excuses for Gus are running out.
Whilst I mentioned Romanov's mad mutterings earlier, it should be pointed out this is not the only controversy surrounding Hearts at the moment. Scotland goalkeeper Craig Gordon has been missing for the past few games, although he could return tomorrow. His absence is likely down to his appearance in the "Riccarton Three" earlier in the season, alongside Paul Hartley and Stephen Pressley. The latter two have already left, perhaps showing exactly what Romanov thought of them going public on the not very behind the scenes turmoil. I could tell you something about the Lithuanians who have been signed as replacements, but quite frankly I'd be making it up!
It would be nice to think we could take advantage of all the madness to take something from Tynecastle, but frankly I can't see it. 1-0 to Hearts.