Here you'll find all your run of the mill prizes as well as a few more unusual ones as I try (and fail) to make a few jokes.
Player of the Year: Steven Thompson. A few contenders, but I plumped for the Thommohawk. To score as many goals as he has in a side that finished second bottom is impressive, but he's about more than that. He's a terrific all round striker, a great ambassador for the club and seems to be playing some of the best football of his career despite the fact it's in its latter stages.
Young Player of the Year: John McGinn. Handed his first start in a crucial game against Dundee in November and hasn't looked back. Superb vision and passing ability, a great dribbler and not afraid to have a shot. Finally got his first goal in the last game of the season. A huge future awaits.
Most Improved Player of the Year. Gary Teale. Last season "Teale will tear you apart" was said in hope. Now it is a fact. Like Thompson, his career is enjoying an Indian summer. Capable of taking players on and delivering a superb cross, his selfless play in the League Cup Final set up our equaliser and turned the game. Hard to believe that a year ago many of us (including myself) were hoping the rumours linking him with a move to Rangers had some truth.
Goal of the Season - individual effort: Graham Carey v Hearts. It won the SPL award so I suppose it should win ours! An absolute thunderblaster from about 40 yards that dipped down behind Hearts goalie Jamie MacDonald.
Goal of the Season - importance: Conor Newton v Hearts. The young midfielder's first ever senior goal put us two clear against the Jambos and proved to be the winner. Notable mention for Aberdeen's Niall McGinn scoring against Dundee to keep us up.
Goal of the Season - moment: Steven Thompson v Celtic. Yes, Newton's goal won us the cup but for me Thompson's strike in the semi was just glorious. After burying a fine cross from fellow Saints fan Marc McAusland, the big striker would probably have ended up halfway up the stand if Lee Mair hadn't caught him. The celebration was my PC background for weeks and was put on T-shirts. It was a moment we all dreamed of doing ourselves.
Individual Performance of the Season: Esmael Goncalves v St Johnstone. The man from Rio Ave should have had four or five but had to settle for a couple. He terrorised the Saintees defence and won himself the player of the round prize.
Signing of the Season: Paul Dummett. It was between the loan three and as we got him at the start of the campaign it goes to Dummett. Solid and mainly reliable at leftback, he bagged himself a couple of goals and was an asset going forward - as his cross for the second at Hampden proves.
Highlight of the Season: Winning the League Cup. Easiest award ever!
Lowlight of the Season: Losing to Hearts after the split. A rather hideous hammering as our post-split slump continued that really had you wondering if Dundee would pull off the impossible.
Best Decision of the Season: Starting Esmael Goncalves in the League Cup semi-final. You could have made a case for sticking with the players that got us that far, but Isma quickly blew that theory out of the water.
Worst Decision of the Season: Bobby Madden against Celtic: Take your pick from a disallowed goal, a penalty that wasn't given, a dive that got a penalty and a red card the SFA decided was wrong. Special mention to pubs in Paisley not letting anyone in with Saints shirts on the night of the cup final. And they wonder why they're not making any money!
Surprise of the Season: Gary Teale. As already mentioned, his form last season was poor. This season he was so good and important our performances divebombed when he was injured.
Disappointment of the Season: Jon Robertson. Bringing in the second division player of the year seemed to be a good move but, aside from the odd moment, he just hasn't cut it at this level. He was even loaned back to Cowdenbeath at one point and it wouldn't be a surprise to see him leave in the summer.
Special Melchester Rovers kit for Roy Race impersonation: Steven Thompson. Veteran player signs for the club he supported as a boy, scoring in a cup semi-final and a final in front of his own fans before lifting the trophy. Fairytale stuff.
Gunni Torfason Cult Hero Trophy: Esmael Goncalves. There comes a point where you have to wonder if the guy is a full on hero than just a cult one, however for the moment Isma is in the latter category. Scoring seven minutes into your debut in a country you've been in less than a week before adding three goals in your next two games and a cup final equaliser is pretty special stuff. He'll be remembered long after he's left.
Manager of the Season: Derek Adams. To bring a side up from the first division and have them pushing for Europe until the final few weeks of the season is remarkable - and makes you wonder why none of our SPL managers has done it.
Services to Comedy Award: Rangers. Retaining the award in fine style. On the pitch they blundered their way to the third division title with some hilarious defeats along the way, while on the pitch the antics of Charles Green, Craig Whyte et al have continued to entertain.
Best Performance by a Former Saint: Steve Clark. A fine first season in management for the ex Buddie and he looks to have a bright future. Special mention to Alex Ferguson, who is now heading in to a well earned retirement.
Golden bottle for failing to organise a booze up in a brewery: Scottish football. How hard is it to come up with a sensible, viable form of league reconstruction? Apparently very, given how close we were to a ridiculous 8-8-8 proposal.
Chant of the season: "Where were you on Paddy's Day?". Sung by the Saints support when Celtic visited us after our League Cup triumph, which came on St Patrick's Day after we put them out in the semis. One pub had rather prematurely arranged a cup final/St Patrick's Day party. Oops.
So long, we hardly knew ye prize: Sander Puri. A mere two appearances for the Estonian international. And to think Danny Lennon considered playing him in the cup final.
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