The sensible awards will be presented first to get them out of the way.
Player of the season: Craig Hinchcliffe. Craig was outstanding between the sticks for Saints this season. The only reason he didn't get to play was because he was injured, and the team was much poorer without him. A worthy winner.
Young player of the season: Simon Lappin. Unlike last season, we didn't have any youngsters breaking through, so this award came down to a straight fight between Simon and Kirk Broadfoot. Thanks to his goals, Scotland appearances and good performances, Simon was the winner by miles.
Goal of the season: Clyde v Simon Lappin. A fantastic cross from substitute to Allan Russell was meat in the box with a vicious left foot by Simon. Completely unstoppable, and was voted goal of the season by Scotsport as well!
Match of the season: St. Mirren 3-2 Ayr United. Saints led three times in Gus MacPherson's first home game as caretaker. All three goals were brilliant. There was slagging of a former Saint, and a last minute winner to make this a fantastic match.
Moment of the season: Brian McGinty v Ayr United at Love Street. Saints were struggling, having been a goal down to ten men in a relegation crunch match. David van Zanten had hammered home the equaliser a few minutes earlier, before Brian brilliantly struck the ball past Ludovic Roy in the Ayr goal. From the cheer, you'd have thought we'd won promotion. Saints went on to win 4-1.
Signing of the season: Craig Hinchcliffe. Despite the fact we made around 14 signings, most flattered to deceive or didn't play enough. John O'Neill started well then faded, as did Mark Crilly, whilst Laurie Ellis missed half the year. Craig is a run away winner.
Disappointment of the season: Barry Lavety. This category was dud rather than disappointment last year, however I think that would be unfair to Basher, plus I don't think giving it to a current player is a good idea (are you reading Kevin McGowne?). Only one goal, countless misses and several spells of injury made it a season to forget for Barry. Hopefully he'll be better next year.
Best decision of the season: Sacking John Coughlin. The only problem here was that it took too long, and another season was wasted.
Worst decision of the season: Re-signing Paul McKnight. A stroke of genius from Coughlin. As with the last time, he was always injured.
Best performance by a former Saint: Ludovic Roy. Annoyed the Ayr fans when he waved to the Saints fans at Love Street, creating a rare situation where a player was booed by his own fans and cheered by the away ones!
Now on to the not so sensible awards.
Bottle Smashing Award: Greenock Morton. Tweleve points clear at Christmas, heading to two titles in a row. End of the season? Fourth place! Well done Morton. Where are all those Morton fans now, the ones who claimed they'd pass us on our way down?
The Chris Sutton award for most obscure conspiracy theory: The Morton Betting Scandal. A fantastic rumour, whoever started it should be congratulated. Apparently it was all the work of Saints fans. A claim that Morton players had bet against them going up was believed by their fans, who actually attacked players. Genius!
Paul McKnight Memorial Trophy for services to the NHS: Kevin Twaddle. It looked like Paul was on to win his own trophy, however he was beaten by Kevin Twaddle who came up with bizarre excuses such as tooth ache for missing games. Notable mentions for Barry Lavety and Eddie Annand in this category, the latter managing to break a bone in the same foot twice!
And there it is, the end of season Mirren Mad awards. If any player wants their award, pay me money and I'll get you a trophy :-)